What In The Kristi Noem Is A Bimbofication Kink?

Former Secretary of Homeland Security Kristi Noem apparently isn’t the only one in the family who likes to play dress up.

On Tuesday, the Daily Mail reported that Noem’s husband, Bryon Noem, shared photos online of himself in women’s clothing, often with fake breasts, and chatted up women in the “bimbofication” fetish scene.

Noem ― the recently ousted DHS secretary who staged costly photo ops in firefighter and ICE officer gear during her tenure ― is “devastated” by the news, a rep told the New York Post.

Using the pseudonym “Jason Jackson,” Bryon Noem reportedly told models he loved “huge, huge ridiculous boobs,” and made “indiscreet remarks” about his wife, the Daily Mail reported.

The 56-year-old, who works as an insurance agent in South Dakota, where his wife served as that state’s governor, also allegedly shelled out upwards of $25,000 via CashApp and PayPal to the models.

Between consenting adults, sexual kinks are generally no one’s business. But Bryon Noem’s online behavior could have left his wife, who oversaw DHS until her dismissal earlier this month, vulnerable to blackmail.

Naturally — and without yucking anyone’s yum — curious minds this week are bound to ask: What exactly is a bimbofication kink? Below, two sex educators ― and a bimbofication online model ― explain.

Bimbofication is a practice, kink and/or fetish that involves role-playing and transforming oneself into a stereotypical portrayal of a “bimbo:” Cartoonish, often surgically enhanced boobs, heavy makeup, overdone lip injections, a girlie aesthetic (short skirts, tight shirts). Think Jessica Rabbit pouring out of a red gown or the late Anna Nicole Smith during her iconic Guess ad campaign days.

Bimbofication is about having the right attitude, too, said Niki Davis-Fainbloom, a sex educator and the author of the upcoming book “Fetish: Smash Fetishes and Celebrate What Turns You On.”

“It’s the look, but it’s also a shift toward a more carefree, appearance-focused, and sexually expressive persona,” she told HuffPost. “Think ‘Legally Blonde’ if the fantasy leaned fully into the aesthetic without the twist of hidden brilliance.”

While the aesthetic may scream “straight male fantasy,” kinksters who are into the sexual subculture are quite diverse — someone can be a Rhodes scholar and still enjoy playing “dumb.” There are lipstick lesbian bimbos and cisgender straight men who bimbo-fy because it’s fun to tap into your feminine side.

Bimbofication is about the fantasy: the role-play, the intentional performance of a highly specific aesthetic and behavioral script. For some, there’s a real joy in objectification and prettifying yourself to an almost absurd degree.

Whether or not bimbofication is a “fetish” for someone depends on the role it plays in their arousal, Davis-Fainbloom said.

For some, it’s an occasional fantasy or aesthetic they find exciting. For others, it may have started when they were younger and grown into a more prominent part of their sexual landscape over time, she said.

“Like most desires, it exists on a spectrum — defined less by the content itself and more by how central, consistent and erotically charged it is for the individual,” she said.

Bimbofication as a distinct fetish is not super common, but elements of it show up far more broadly across people’s fantasies and turn-ons, she said.

“Many more people are turned on by transformation, exaggeration and taboo femininity than would identify with the label itself,” she said. “Because people don’t often talk openly about their fetishes, we tend to assume they’re rarer than they actually are, so it may be more common than you think.”

Interestingly, the rise of this kink is happening at the same time feminists and young women on TikTok are reclaiming the word “bimbo.” For them, it’s not a misogynistic slur but a fully-embraced identity: Bimbos on TikTok say you can be skimpily dressed, pro-sex work, pro-pink and girly, pro-surgery, even, and still be authentically yourself and a feminist.

Heather Shannon, a sex coach and host of the “Sex For Couples” podcast, thinks there’s some overlap between the kink and the reclamation of the word.

“On a cultural level, both are about making it OK to be super feminine, care about outward appearances and be sexually expressive,” she said. “The TikTokers are doing it in a way that shifts the culture we live in and what’s socially acceptable, and the kinksters are doing it, often privately, in a way that finds pleasure in something that’s become taboo.”

The public and media likely wouldn’t be dissecting the Bryon Noem story so intensely if not for the photos uncovered by the Daily Mail: In selfies he allegedly sent to online models, he wears lopsided, cartoonishly oversized fake breasts beneath a pink spandex shirt and purses his lips suggestively. It’s a far cry from the “family man” images we’ve seen of him.

While only speculating, Shannon thinks Noem may be interested in becoming the bimbo himself.

“This would be a cross-dressing version of the kink,” she said. “Since he’s also engaging with bimbo models, he’s worshipping the bimbo archetype as a sexual ideal. There’s an overlap here because he’s trying to become the thing he most appreciates on a sexual level or perhaps just an embodied level.”

What she means by embodied is that he gets to physically access a very different ― very feminine ― side of himself that he might not get to access anywhere else.

“And the fact that he’s spending money on this means it’s clearly of value to him to access this part of himself and have an outlet to express it,” she said.

Jessy Bunny, a popular bimbo model who lives in Mallorca, Spain, said she sees men go down this path all the time: The bimbo admirer becomes the bimbo.

“Bimbofication is a way for them to let their feminine side come through,” she told HuffPost. “This doesn’t mean that they are trans but that they love to crossplay at least. Bimbofication is open for all sex and gender identifications.”

Bunny, who is engaged to Vienna Xtreme, a trans bimbo model who’s said to have the world’s biggest lips, thinks a lot more men are into bimbofication than they let on.

“There are two categories of men I come across in my fan base,” she said. “First, the ones who like seeing women turn into ‘bimbos’ and two, men who haven’t realized yet that they would love to be feminized.”

Some observers have noted the hypocrisy inherent in this story: Here we have the husband of a political leader whose party publicly espouses “family values” while routinely looking down on LGBTQ+ people and alternative lifestyles actively engaging in one of those alternative lifestyles.

Those critics also point to the long-circulated rumors that Kristi Noem is having an affair with her former Homeland Security aide Corey Lewandowski, even though both are married to other people. (At a hearing of the House Judiciary Committee earlier this month, Kristi Noem called the rumors “tabloid garbage.”)

Josh Sorbe, who handles communications for the Senate Judiciary Committee Democrats and lives in Noem’s home state of South Dakota, summed up what many people are thinking about the conservative couple given the aforementioned narratives.

“The Bryon Noem story perfectly encapsulates these people’s hypocrisy and insecurity,” Sorbe, who is gay, said in a statement on X. “They ostracize any queer person in public, but they love to queen out and do gay shit behind the scenes. Get well, and I’ll even cheer on your bad drag after they’re out of power.”

The fact that Bryon Noem is conservative and is allegedly dabbling in drag and a little-known kink doesn’t surprise Davis-Fainbloom at all. She noted that research shows that southern “Bible Belt” states like Mississippi, Louisiana and Georgia have historically ranked among the highest for gay porn searches.

“It’s often in environments where people feel constrained or unable to express themselves that secrecy increases ― sometimes leading to dishonesty in relationships and more extreme or hidden forms of behavior,” she said.

There’s nothing wrong with being turned on by bimbofication and exploring that in ways that bring you pleasure. In fact, this is a kink that seems like a whole lot of fun to Davis-Fainbloom.

“For me, the ethical concerns around this [Noem] story are around potentially lying to his partner about his behavior, and possibly breaking their relationship agreements,” she said.

If there was secrecy involved, Bunny, the bimbo model we spoke to, isn’t surprised.

“I have lots of male followers who like huge fake tits on women but also tell me that they have problems explaining this to their wife or girlfriend,” she said. “I think the world would be a better place if people could be how they really are and discuss their kinks without fear of getting judged.”

With careful communication, sex educators say that a kink you’ve long kept private is always something you can bring up with your partner — and, if there’s mutual interest, even introduce into your relationship.

“A lot of my work with couples is about them sharing their desires with their partner and finding ways to explore them ethically,” Davis-Fainbloom said. “It can be done.”