Once upon a time, people swiped on dating profiles because of big biceps, adorable dogs, or the massive fish a person may or may not have actually caught.
Dating culture, however, is always evolving. Suddenly we’re “freak matching” or “shrekking” or intentionally looking for a “slow burn” romance. But, now, one of the latest must-haves for a sparkling dating profile feels surprisingly down-to-earth: showing off a love of reading.
Recently, pop star Dua Lipa married actor Callum Turner in a glamorous, multiday Italian wedding extravaganza. As gorgeous as the celebrations were, it was their meet-cute that really captured people’s imaginations.
Turner shared that they met at a mutual friend’s birthday party, when they sat next to each other and discovered they were both reading the exact same book, ”Trust” by Hernán Díaz. Not only that, but they had both just finished the first chapter.
To which Turner claimed he said to his future wife, “So we’re on the same page.”
If a rom-com writer pitched that storyline, we might call it unrealistic. But the internet, upon hearing this story, was totally swooning.
In modern swipe culture, books are boosting attraction. Reading has become a staple of dating app profiles, whether it’s including your favorite novel as a prompt, stating your go-to genre, or specifying that you’re “looking for someone to talk books with.” Reading is quickly becoming an item on our good partner wish list — and, for many, a non-negotiable.
This is what a reader’s dating profile really tells you.
Whether it’s romantasy, a Dan Brown airport thriller, or the latest BookTok sensation, reading — and talking about reading — seems to be having a moment. And dating apps are no different.
“These days, we tend to seek partners on dating platforms. So the first thing that pops up is a photo,” Dr. Suzanne Degges-White, a licensed counselor and relationship expert at the Headway app, told HuffPost. “But it’s not just a face or a beautiful background anymore that gets the swipe right; people look for some cues that would show foundation for connection, intelligence and empathy.”
Citing research from Headway examining modern trends around readers, Degges-White said they found “that 75% of people, regardless of physical attractiveness, find partners who read or indicate that they are well-read more attractive.”
“This evokes a certain emotional maturity that people are seeking in a partner,” she continued. “People consider books a sign of a willingness to better understand oneself and others, develop empathy and resolve conflicts.”
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Tinder users apparently report similar patterns: “Reading is clearly having a moment,” Devyn Simone, the app’s relationship expert, told HuffPost. “Mentions of books in Tinder bios are up 29% overall and have jumped 41% among women. When someone shares what they’re reading, it offers a glimpse into their inner world. Are they into sweeping romance, dark thrillers or epic fantasy? Those choices hint at what excites them, what they value in connection and how they might show up in love.”
“With 37% of singles saying shared values are important to them, showcasing your interests isn’t performative — it’s purposeful,” Simone said. “Singles today are craving partners who feel thoughtful, intentional and just a little bit like the main character.”
When did reading become hot?
I didn’t realize I wanted to date a reader until I actually did. I once spent three months in a relationship with someone who loved books as much as I did — and some of my favorite memories were simply talking about what we were reading. He read the books I recommended, and I did the same for him.
Although the relationship didn’t work out — and he wasn’t a great match in many other ways — I still think fondly about those conversations.
“There’s something undeniably attractive about someone who reads,” Annabelle Knight, sex and relationships expert at Lovehoney, told HuffPost. “It signals curiosity, emotional intelligence and empathy — all qualities that translate beautifully into relationships and the bedroom.”
Plus, there are other benefits of a well-read mind: “A partner who reads is often more in tune with communication, more open-minded, and more willing to explore different perspectives, which can create deeper emotional and sexual connections.”
Reading also creates conversation fuel. Silence becomes easier to navigate when you can talk about a book.
“For singles, bonding over books can create a slow-burn kind of tension,” Knight continues. “Sharing favorite passages, discussing characters you’re drawn to, or even reading the same spicy novel at the same time can build anticipation and spark conversations about desires in a way that feels safe and playful. It’s a subtle form of foreplay that starts long before you’re physically intimate.”
“Ultimately, reading stimulates the brain, and the brain is the body’s biggest erogenous zone,” Knight says. “When you turn someone’s mind on, the rest tends to follow.”
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Simone also noted that it’s not just about the books themselves, but the habit of reading. Nowadays, millennials and Gen Z alike are known to have shorter attention spans, and a 300-page book is very different from a 20-word Instagram caption.
“There’s something quietly confident about someone who can unplug and focus,” she said. “In a culture built on constant scrolling and short attention spans, reading signals patience, curiosity and emotional range — all qualities that contribute to real chemistry and connection. So of course, reading is hot!”
While someone having different reading habits from you is hardly an intense dealbreaker, it could be important for you — and someone with a list of interesting books they’ve read (and an interest in what you’ve read) can totally be a green flag.
And, at the end of the day, who wouldn’t want to find someone to curl up next to and enjoy a good book?
