“There are all kinds of love in this world but never the same love twice.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald
When I was in 3rd grade, I met a boy from another class. I didn’t really pay much attention to him at first, but since our classrooms were next to each other, I saw him every break time. He was very friendly and playful, and basically, he was everyone’s friend.
Since then, I started paying more attention to him, and like anyone else, I wanted to be friends with him too. But I was really shy, so all I did was watch him from afar. Maybe I said hi to him once before, but that was it.
Ironically, that’s when I started liking him — I suddenly liked everything he did.
Have you guys watched Kimi ni Todoke? If you have, then let me tell you this — he was like Kazehaya, even though I didn’t know Kazehaya back then. It’s just that whenever I try to describe him now, he reminds me of Kazehaya. He was kind, playful, and friendly — everyone’s favorite. And like Kazehaya, he was passionate about sports, even now.
That’s why I started liking him.
So yeah, the whole year I was just admiring him. But the next school year, in 4th grade, I transferred to a different school, and I didn’t get to see him for a year. That’s when I became pretty sure it was just a crush, nothing more, because I didn’t really think about him that much — maybe sometimes, but not intensely, you know what I mean.
Then 5th grade came, and it was around the time our school festival started — or maybe the next day, I can’t really recall which.
But that’s when I met him again after a year
I was about to enter a horror booth with my friends when someone suddenly called me. I recognized that familiar voice right away — I hadn’t forgotten it at all. When I turned around, I saw him smiling, and my heart started racing like crazy. I’m pretty sure my face turned as red as a tomato. At the same time, I felt really happy, because he knew me — I didn’t even realize he knew who I was until that moment.
But my 5th-grade self didn’t say hi. I remember it clearly. I think I either swore at him or just awkwardly smiled, because that’s how I used to be — very defensive and I swore a lot. If I had said hi, I would remember it, but I didn’t, and it would have added to my happy moments. Still, seeing him again after a year was memorable.
Anyway, after seeing him, I entered the horror booth, so I was having mixed emotions — scared, happy, and excited about seeing him again after I got out, while also trying not to pee my pants because of the jump scares in the horror booth.
Unfortunately, I didn’t see him again, and just like that, the school festival ended, as did my 5th-grade year, without me seeing him again. I also did a side quest of sorts — walking around my old school just to try to see him.
And yes, it wasn’t just a crush anymore… somewhere along the way, it became more than we ever expected. That was where my first love began, and it still felt like the beginning.
